A short and simple guide on how to not get pissed off so easily
Especially If you’re an impatient freak like me
Somebody cuts your lane in traffic.
Someone knocks into you while walking but glares as you as he walks away.
An appointment/meeting stood you up.
Your colleague is asking you to do task that is not what you’re usually assigned to do.
A customer is really demanding and requesting for unreasonable services.
Your significant other is bickering at you for not spending enough time with them.
You get the gist.
When faced with these kind of situations, as a normal human being with something call EGO, your first instinct is to get defensive and put the blame on external circumstances.
But what If there is a better way to deal with these situations?
Let me break it down step-by-step:
- Breathe (like, a HUGE breath).
- Smile (Fake it til’ you make it).
Ok, so now you’ve got the time to think before you react, then you…
3. Reassure yourself that by being calm you are not being an idiot like this person who just annoyed you.
4. Seek to understand then to be understood. Leave aside all pre-assumption and judgement.
5. Ask questions.
6. Listen to their point of view.
7. Put yourself in their shoes.
8. Realized we’re all human and be aware that you’ve had pissed(and will at some point again) pissed someone else unconsciously.
9. Check in with your feelings too. Why do I feel annoyed at the first place? Is there an underlying reason that I have never sought to understand about myself through this situation? Am I going to let this issue affect how I feel for the rest of the day, week, months…you know where I’m going with this.
10. Compliment them. Give them a helping hand If they are struggling with something. Discuss and work out something that can benefit both parties in the best way possible. When you make them feel good, you make yourself feel even better.
Great Job!
Pat yourself in the back for being able to control your emotions and being able to avoid unnecessary tension and conflict; for being able to seek peace in every circumstances; for taking that one step to improving yourself and your relationships.
Now move on with your life and go have some fun!
Zen out and thank you for reading,
Tien Cin
Add me on Instagram @tiencinyong for my (occasional) social media purges.